Are Your Children Getting a BETTER Education Than YOU Did?

I don’t think there’s one decent parent out there who doesn’t want BETTER things for their child than what they had growing up.

Are your children getting a BETTER education than YOU did?

Is your child struggling in the same areas academically in which you struggled?

Did your child take after “the other parent” and is succeeding far better than you had ever imagined?

Does school seem like it’s more difficult than when you were in school?

Genuinely stop and ask yourself these questions.

When I meet with tutoring families, I hear different experiences but one thing is in common: school is different now than it was then.

Different should be expected, but these same parents I hear from do not describe the difference as an improvement. Rather, it’s a point of frustration.

I once worked on a second grade team of teachers with someone who was teaching her first year outside of kindergarten. She had been in kindergarten teaching for over 20 years! She had some input on how it had changed. For one thing, she said they expected more academically now than what they had in the past. In other words, kindergarten was the new first grade.

Keep in mind that now we have more single parent homes, more divorced and mixed families, yet we are expecting what used to be first grade work out of kindergarteners. That seems backwards to me. And if you think it doesn’t matter when children have only one parent or come from a mixed family where they are spending different nights at different homes, think again. There is so much confusion and miscommunication most of the time that happens. Sometimes there’s quite a bit of turmoil. On the other hand, consider the families who may have a grandparent or two living nearby who can be an extra adult to help out. Those children have an added advantage when it comes to getting attention with schoolwork or life skills in general. So with more families broken and struggling, we are now expecting MORE out of the students?

When I taught third grade, it used to be the first grade for standardized testing. That was the year the students had to not only learn the material for the test but also learn test taking skills—particularly for multiple choice questions:

—eliminating wrong answers

—checking work

—finding evidence for the correct answer

—keeping track of which question you’re on

Nowdays, I’m seeing multiple choice tests being done as young as first grade! Are first graders more mature NOW than what they were 20 years ago? Someone help me out here!

Recently my first grade tutoring student brought his reading test home. Nevermind the fact that he should be working on phonics rules and be tested in a way where he is one-on-one and a teacher can listen to him read aloud and answer basic comprehension questions. He is expected to do a multi-page test based on a passage and then choose the right answer. Nevermind that he likely has ADHD and by the time he reached the last page he was “done” and missed all of them.

To be clear, I don’t believe most children these days are getting a better education than their parents. I think the learning experience has been muddied. The arts have been taken out in many cases. Playtime has been reduced (and remember what Mr. Rogers said about playtime). The love of learning has been sucked away by more and more assignments and tests, particularly at an elementary level.

Be honest. Would we have nearly as many children struggling with learning to read at the third and fourth and fifth grade levels if they’d had adequate reading instruction in the primary grades? They went to school for 180 days for 3 years and still didn’t learn to read well. That makes me stop and wonder, “What WERE they doing?” Well, I don’t really have to wonder. I can tell from tests of my tutoring students and the standards written how the time was spent.

Instead of teaching phonics and how to actually figure out the word so that you can figure out the sentence and be able to read the story, they jumped ahead to assessing comprehension. Don’t get me wrong, reading isn’t reading without comprehension. However the goal is to have the child read independently. You can’t get that without a solid foundation in phonics and decoding words.

You can develop comprehension and language arts skills like plot and character simply through read-alouds and asking verbal questions. It doesn’t always require a paper test to learn or assess! It’s important to not leave gaps in phonics instruction. You can’t always assume a child will be able to fill in those gaps.

Someone might ask, “What about you, Rebecca? Are your children getting a better education than you did?”

Well, I really cannot complain too much on my foundational education. Like many of you, I had a loving environment throughout elementary school with supportive teachers, class parties, recess, and the basics of reading, writing, and arithmetic. I had my own parents as teachers! My mother was my first teacher. She taught me how to read and never waited for the schools to do so. My dad taught my math classes in 4th and 5th grade. I attended a small country school K-5. After elementary school, my education was very much a hit and miss. So much depended on the quality of the teacher. A few classes really stick out to me. In middle school I had handful of quality teachers (and I do remember what I learned in their classes). In high school, it was even fewer teachers that I felt were quality teachers.

My own children are getting a better education than I did. I chose to homeschool them from the beginning. I’m teaching them just as my parents taught me. The main difference is I get more time with them and have control over what is taught. I can customize how I teach them. I can allow them to develop life skills along the way. I can pick up where we left off and minimize learning gaps. I don’t have to stop in the summer time, but I have the freedom to give lighter loads of school work. They love to learn. They don’t always love work, but that’s normal. I can have conversations and ask them questions connecting the dots between related ideas in different subject areas. I can allow them to pursue interests and develop their knowledge in those interests. I can finish a math book. Imagine that! Never in my years of a student was I able to finish any textbook. In the next month, my son will finish a super thick math book he’s worked on for the past two years. We plan to celebrate. I know his foundations in math are solid.

To sum up, I don’t have to worry about my children having shaky foundations in reading, writing, and math because they are overly tested or given material that is not developmentally appropriate. They have enough knowledge at this point that they COULD continue learning without me. Why? Because they know how to READ. That’s the single most important thing you should learn in school. It opens doors to everything else. To think we have upper elementary students who cannot adequately read is truly sad. Simply put, the teachers need training in phonics instruction and need to be relieved of teaching standards that should be saved for upper elementary and middle school. Not everything in the listed standards is of equal importance. Learning to read is more important than comparing and contrasting characters, determining the main idea, or even telling the setting of a story.

You know how to read. You have a career. Hopefully your self-esteem was not damaged by repeated low grades. Can you say the same for your child? Is your child on track to be a successful adult? Is your child over-burdened with testing? Do you spend so much time studying for the next test (spelling, science, social studies) that you have no time left to practice reading fluently? Rigor has it’s place in education, but thoroughly teaching the basics does too and should not be ignored.

You are your child’s most influential teacher. You are your child’s best advocate. If you do not speak up for your child, who will? Whether you choose the homeschool route, a tutor, practice in the evenings and on weekends or send your child to a private school….you need to make a plan. Do not fully depend on other people.

If you are curious about homeschooling, check out my Survival Guide for the New Homeschool Family.

If you are in need of help teaching your child to be better reader check out my courses here!

Don’t forget! YOU are your child’s most influential teacher.